The last in my ‘First Chapters’ series comes to an end as we are up to date! The Sonic Dilda’tor was a short story in the ‘Love & Lust in Space’ anthology which came out in November.
“What you need is a Sonic Dilda’tor.”
“I beg your pardon?” Skarlet wasn’t sure she correctly heard Pock, the sex therapist. This was her second session here on the planet of Vulvania. Tactile, like all people from her own planet of Clusio, Skarlet was finding it difficult adjusting to life on the home world of her husband, Braemel.
In truth, it wasn’t just the rigid Vulvanian culture she was finding hard, but her husband’s lack of emotion. Married now for two years, she wondered if she had made a mistake in thinking the two of them could make their differences work. Not least, because a Vulvanian came into heat, whether man or woman, only once every five years.
When they had met on her planet, whilst Braemel was on a diplomatic mission, he had been just starting his cycle of sexuality. Not only did his hormones drive his emotions causing him to pursue Skarlet with fervent demonstrations of love and lust, but it also made him incredibly attractive to Clusions. She had to quickly declare herself to him before she lost him to rivals. Not that she regretted her choice. At least, she hadn’t until eight months ago when this phase began to wear off and sex between them ceased to happen.
“A Sonic Dilda’tor is what you require,” repeated Pock.
Skarlet was taken aback. Is he making a joke? However, Vulvanians were famous for their lack of humour.
“Unfortunately, they are outlawed on this planet.”
Yes, he is laughing at me. “Um. Why mention it then?”
The sex therapist looked down his nose at her and glared, his dark eyes boring into her. Skarlet often felt inferior on this world of people who were the leaders in the International Council and the founding nation of the community of planets.
“I mention it because it is the only logical answer to your problem. It is regrettable from your point of view that your husband’s sexual needs are not aligned to yours. A Sonic Dilda’tor would solve your issue.”
It was Skarlet’s turn to glower. “So why are they forbidden then? It would seem sensible on a planet like yours where your people have varying sexual cycles that you have such an implement.”
Pock nearly smiled. At least, she was sure he was about to. “Indeed. However, Vulvanians do not generally marry someone not matching their needs.”
Skarlet crossed her arms, wishing someone had told her this before she married Braemel.
The therapist continued. “But as you have expressed interest, I will explain the background—for abstract reasons, only.” He settled back in his tilting chair and placed his hands together with just the fingertips touching, in a pose of thoughtful remembrance. “This device was invented for massages. We, Vulvanians, have the highest work ethic, but, at the same time, we refuse to acknowledge when we have over stretched our bodies. By using the Dilda’tor on sore parts of our bodies, the sonic harmonics relax the taut muscles. This way we were able to recover quickly. This meant an ever greater work output ensued, which made all parties satisfied—particularly as this all happened behind closed doors.”
Skarlet was very aware of how reserved a Vulvanian could be from her experience with her husband. But she was intrigued by how this information related to her sex life—or lack of.
“It is not known who first discovered this instrument could be used to stimulate a person’s genitals, but it swiftly became popular amongst the younger Vulvanians. In my profession, I found it very useful to persuade older members of society that this could be the answer to their sexual issues—those that may become misaligned through disease or accident—even if it did mean a drop in my clientele.”
She gasped. Despite his stony expression, Pock definitely had a sense of humour. “I am intrigued as to how it came to be banned, then.”
Pock inclined his head acknowledging her question. “We soon started to notice a remarkable drop in the jujufly population. You may not know, but these insects are essential in pollinating our many fruit trees. Without them, we have no food.”
As the main diet of the Vulvanians, Skarlet could understand why this was so disastrous. “How did you link that to the use of the dildators?”
The therapist gave out such a bark of a laugh that Skarlet jumped and nearly fell out of her seat. “Oh, my dear lady, it is called a Dilda’tor—the emphasis is on ‘Dilda’. It comes from the ancient Vulvanian root word meaning massage. Therefore, ‘to be massaged’. I don’t think the inventor was aware of the similarity to your word as we have nothing like that on our planet. Although, in my profession, I am aware of the ‘toys’ you refer to and am trying to encourage their import.”
Oh! Skarlet could feel her face reddening.
“Having said that, I can see how you could link the two.”
Since she had already made a fool of herself, Skarlet jumped in with another question. “So how exactly is it used to align sexual drives?”
He gave her a stare, his dark eyes boring into her once more. Skarlet jutted her chin out in defiance.
“I take it this is an abstract question, since you would never be in the position of using one and if found out, you do realise it would mean banishment from our planet?”
Skarlet shrugged her shoulders. As she had no idea the object existed, let alone where to get hold of one, she had asked because she was intrigued, even if it didn’t assist with her problem.
“One inserts it into the anus of the male—or vagina of the female—who needs to be brought into heat. The sonic harmonics work to stimulate the hormones in our bodies, adjusting to that of their partner.”
Oh great. Just what I need and I can’t get hold of one.
Pock was finished. “There is a group of people who are lobbying for its return since scientists discovered that by playing the music of the violinet at the same time, it reduces the sonic vibrations and the jujufly is unaffected. But until that time, it remains illegal to use.” He looked up as a buzzer sounded indicating the end of their session. “That finishes my work with you. I am afraid, I can offer no simple solution to your needs other than do as Vulvanians do and absent yourself from sexual activities for the time between your husband’s sexual cycles.”
Saying that to a Clusion was like telling them to cut off a limb. They were such a sexually active species, that Skarlet was in deep depression.
As she left the building, she considered her options. A) Put up with being sexually deprived for the next few years. B) Continue using her own sex toys that she had brought with her—which didn’t give her the satisfaction she required as her body required the presence of semen in order to orgasm. C) Divorce Braemel and return home.
The fourth option, of finding a Dilda’tor, didn’t even enter her head.