Friday 14 June 2013

Rabbit Fridays

Another one from Raven McAllen on the 'other' type of rabbit!


I have a couple of friends who I meet up with in Edinburgh a couple of times a year. One of them is now in her 70's and for some reason always makes a bee-line for a certain sex shop. The first time, I think it was by accident as she saw a nice bra and panty set in the window, which she thought would be a good present for her daughter in law. She dragged us inside before we had a chance to point out where we were. Then we almost got ejected from the shop as she said at the top of her voice, "They're faulty, there's a big hole in them."
You'd think after that she'd realize and not go near the place again.
Oh no, next visit, back in we go. And end up in the vibrator section. To find two of us trying not to laugh, and drag her out, as she examines a rabbit.
"Why do they call it a rabbit?" (my older friend) She stares at it as if it's going to jump up and bite her.
"It looks like one, and it goes like the clappers." (my other friend)
"Rabbits aren’t pink or purple and what's these bits for?" She points at the vibrator, but doesn't touch it.
Me… "Tease your bits."
"They're the ears." (other friend) "Like a rabbit"
At this point my older friend picks up and turns the display model on, and watches the beads in it swirl and vibrate. She touches it to her cheek and shrieks. "Yeuk, its all wobbly. Do people really want that in their lady?" (her words not mine)
Me… "Yes why not?"
"It's good if your other half's on night shift, or away or something. Does a treat." (other friend)
"It's all funny, not a bit like the real thing" (older friend) "I'll settle for my hubby."
At which point she drops it back onto the shelf and it writhes and twists about like a well, vibrator I guess.  The assistant comes over to see if she can help us. We (my other friend and I) are in hysterics, as my older friend looks at it as if it's got a life of its own.
We drag her out, and swear never again…Ha! Not a chance, I think she does it on purpose.

3 comments:

  1. she reminds us of it every time we meet up. Goodness knows what she'd do with a bullet!

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